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“Reducing the Threat of Sexual Violence”

Men and Sexual Violence

    The idea of being sexual assaulted for a man is difficult to accept. Beliefs about “manliness” and “masculinity” are deeply embedded for most men and men usually believe that they will be able to defend themselves against sexual assault. This can lead to intense feelings of guilt, shame and inadequacy because they could not fight off the perpetrator.

     For heterosexual men sexual assault may cause confusion or questioning about their sexuality. It is not true that only gay men are sexually assaulted. A heterosexual victim may begin to believe that he is gay or that he will become gay because of an assault by another man. For some straight men this may prevent them reporting. Sexual assault is not found to have any correlation with changes in sexual orientation.

     The majority of reported sexual assaults against men are committed by men perpetrators; however, 3% are committed by women. Most men who are confronted by women perpetrators often freeze in the situation because they have never considered its possibility. Sexual assault is not about physical strength it is about control. In reality there may be many more female perpetrators but the fear of not being taking seriously may keep many men from disclosing their assaults. Society’s views on this type of assault are changing as more and more men have the courage to speak out.

     It is a myth that if a man becomes aroused that is equal to consent for sex. A man’s body often experiences arousal and even orgasm during a rape because the body reacts independently despite thoughts and feelings rejecting the offense. The body’s response is only a mechanical one and it does indicate enjoyment and it certainly does not stop the rape from being a rape.

    For gay men sexual assault may lead to feelings of self blame and self loathing attached to their sexuality. Being sexually assaulted may lead a gay man to believe he somehow “deserved it” due to his sexual orientation. Gay men may hesitate to report a sexual assault due to fear of blame, disbelief or intolerance. In reality some sexual assaults of men are a form of gay-bashing motivated by fear and hatred of homosexuality. A person’s sexual orientation does not give anyone the right to commit a sexual offense against them.

    More education and understanding is needed to dispel the myths surrounding the sexual assault of men. A RAINN report (2006) found that out of all victims men are the least likely to report and seek help even though it is estimated they make up 10% of all victims. It is essential that society’s myths are dispelled so men feel able to speak out about sexual assault experiences in order to gain justice, support, and the benefits of a process of recovery.

MaleSurvivor.com is an online support group. To view this site please, click here...


References:
Information for Men on Rape, South Eastern Centre Against Sexual Assault is a service of Southern Health

Dispelling the Myths about Male Rape, Pandora’s Project